Neuclear-Era Vehicles

1987 Ford Escort (8/14)

Okay, I've never seen one of these in any cinematic car chase, but I owned one for nearly a decade and it was a good car. Maybe the two stroke, four cylinder engine wasn't a rampaging powerhouse, and maybe its boxy shape never turned any heads: but dammit, the '87 Escort had heart. It started in the winter when it was ten below, under eight inches of snow, it got good gas mileage and it never let me down when I needed it. I figure the least I can do is write it up here. When I sold that car, I felt like I was putting Old Yeller to sleep. Honest. This is the performance you get out of a typical big street car; it can be any nameless car you find in any nameless parking lot anywhere. (Poor)

Prowl Car (9/14)

This is your standard black & white police car with the radio in front, flares and a shotgun in the trunk, and gumball lights on top. (Working Stiff)

The Porsche 911 (11/14)

This car is so fast, they named an emergency response number after it. With a power peak at 5750 rpm, the 1995 Turbo model can go from 0-60 in a hair under four seconds and look good doing it. If you really want to piss off your fellow motorists, take a page from Doug Adams and slap on one of those "My other car is a Porsche!" bumper stickers. (Rich)

Lamborghini Countach (12/12)

This Italian fireball is for people whose need for speed borders on the pathological. The Countach has a top speed of 290 km/h, and can do a standing quarter mile in 12.9 seconds. More importantly, it looks like its going Mach 5 when it's still in park. Get one in candy apple red and you rule the road. Of course, a red Countach is a total cop magnet. Police pull these babies over on general principles, figuring that even if you aren't speeding now, you will be soon. It stands to reason: No one buys a Coutach to drive the speed limit, just like no one gets a satellite dish so they can watch PBS. (Rich)

1965 Restored Vintage Ford Mustang (12/14)

This roadster can pass just about anything on the highway: except a gas station. Built back before the catalytic converter emasculated American muscle cars, the Mustang's full-throated roar still leaves your modern sports cars feeling a little inadequate. (Yeah, I know, this thing probably pollutes as much or more than the sport utes I mocked, but it's okay for a Mustang because (1) they didn't know any better back then and (2) it's got such a cool name.) (Working Stiff: but only if your score in Fix-I is 10 or higher. Otherwise Rich)

1952 Vincent Black Shadow (12/11)

Hunter S. Thompson immortalised the Black Shadow in "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas," and describes it better there than I could here. Suffice to say that this is a wicked, resentful, vicious and sullen vehicle: but one that gets results. Basically, it's the Courtney Love of motorcycles. The Black Shadow, while somewhat finicky about how you start it, is a tough bike.

Bigass Hovercraft (6/18)

God bless Jackie Chan for showing us the chase potential of the bigass hovercraft. (It's in "Rumble in the Bronx," if you're wondering.) When attacking a hovercraft, know that any blunt attack (like ramming or sideswiping it) is just going to bounce off. Only penetrating things (like knives) or sharp things (like an improbably huge sword that you get from a conveniently placed store and wedge in the door of your car) are going to do damage. (Restricted)

Peterbilt Eighteen Wheeler (5/20)/(7/17)

"You're a trucker? How's your peterbilt?" Okay, now that's out of the way!

These stats are for any big, eighteen wheel truck in the "Convoy" / "BJ & the Bear" / "Any Which Way But Loose" mold. The first set of stats is for when it's hauling the trailer, and the second is just for the engine section by itself. (Rich. Everyday heroes can own one of these if they're wildcat truckers: an everyday hero type of job if there ever was one.)

Jet Fighters (26/16)

Jets usually have a couple machineguns and autocannon. Similarly, they've got some big air to air missiles or bombs. Their only problem is that they can't stand still; one attack run a Sequence is good maneovering against ground targets. Incidentally, if you want to borrow a page from "Jewel of the Nile" and drive one on the ground, it's got Pep 9. (Restricted)

Small Helicopter (14/10)

Use these stats for most civilian use helicopters: traffic copters, rich-guy transportation and Medevac choppers. This also covers the chopper that T.C. flew back on "Magnum P.I." (Anyone remember T.C.? Anyone?) (Rich, or Working Stiff if you just run the thing for someone else.)

Apache Battle Helicopter (18/20)

When these are flying, they are the most bad-ass thing that can cover the ground; planes still rule the skies. But mostly, it's just sitting there, waiting for insanely-expensive spare parts. Armament is similar to that of a jet fighter, only the missiles are air-to-ground.

Zodiac skiff (11/4)

These sounded so cool in the novel "Zodiac" that I decided to put 'em in here. Basically, this is a rubber raft with an insanely huge motor stuck on the back. According to Neal Stephenson the propeller is the only thing that touches the water when these get up to speed. However, their Pep decreases by 1 for everyone other than the skipper who gets aboard. The perilously tiny Toughness number represents the downside of such a nimble, lightweight hull. (Poor)

Cigarette Boat (10/13)

Okay, who else started humming the theme from "Miami Vice" as soon as you saw the phrase "cigarette boat"? You can fess up, it's okay. These are racing boats, officially. In practice, they're more often used as "Hey ladies, check out this incredible symbol of my virility!" boats. That, or "Run! It's the Coast Guard! And we've got eight pounds of cocaine hidden in the cooler!" boats. (Rich)